Friday, July 12, 2013

In the grip of His grace

The Bible tells us in II Corinthians 12:9 that God's grace is sufficient.   In other words, it is enough, adequate, and of ample supply. Also, the latter portion of that scripture talks about how His strength is made perfect in our weakness.

I can attest to the faithfulness of God in that passage of scripture since my loss last year. Some days His grace leave me speechless.  His love overwhelms me.  His peace is beyond anything I have ever experienced.  I have literally been in awe of the awesomeness of our God. There is no way I can walk this journey without Him in my life.

As of this writing, I don't have the full scope of what God has in store for me or where He's leading me.   However,  I do know it is exceeding, abundantly, above anything I have ever asked for or dared to dream.  My best days are ahead of me, and the rest of my life WILL BE the best of  my life.  I know that for certain because God promised.

As I continue to bask in His faithfulness, experience His peace, and be engulfed in His love, I can't help but encourage you that God is no respecter of person.  He knows right where you are.  He sees everything you have gone through and He has not forgotten about you.

Please understand that seasons change and this too shall pass.  I'm not expressing something I've read, but I'm sharing what I have experienced.

As you continue to stand in faith for the manifestation, and believe God for the breakthrough, realize that His grace is sufficient and His strength is made perfect in your weakness.

God has a set time for your deliverance, and He will not be a moment late.  He will come through for you!

As I continue on this journey called life, I know God is faithful to complete the work He has started in me.  However, in the meantime, I will remain in the grip of His grace.

Tuesday, December 4, 2012

Life interrupted

I haven't felt much like writing lately.

It has almost been 3 months since Marvin passed and it feels like yesterday. I still wonder everyday  what in the world is going on.  It still seems absolutely crazy to me that he's gone.  To say that our lives have been interrupted is an understatement.

No matter what it looks like, I know God has a plan.  All in all, I'm still walking in an abundance of peace.  The grace of God is sustaining me every day and is enabling me to walk through the most difficult season of my life.

God is so faithful. Although I don't understand what He's doing, I trust Him with our future.

To God be the glory!!!

Monday, October 22, 2012

WebMD will tamper with your faith

I am an avid reader. I love the Internet. In actuality, I don’t understand how people function without it.  I would deem myself as an "information junkie."  I love to dig in and do research. I want to know, who, what, when, where and why, and sometimes I get on my own nerves.

The world-wide-web (www) is an invaluable resource for providing information.  One website that is quite popular these days is WebMD.

WebMD provides a plethora of information regarding ones health. You have the option to type in your symptoms, and it will give you a cyber diagnosis, or you can look up any disease and it will give you all of the specifics.  However, in tiny print at the bottom of their website, the disclaimer reads, “WebMD does not provide medical advice, diagnosis or treatment.”  Some doctors will advise you to stay off the Internet once a diagnosis has been given because what you read can really shake you up.

Marvin was first diagnosed with rheumatoid arthritis, then systemic lupus, neither of which were correct.  A different specialist was finally able to pinpoint the issue, and the diagnosis came back as autoimmune myelofibrosis.  He developed other non-related health issues along the way, however, complications from autoimmune myelofibrosis is what took his life.

Prior to Marvin’s diagnosis we never heard of autoimmune myelofibrosis.  And today, I still don’t know the, who, what, when, where and why of it.  I never Google’d it.  I never put his symptoms in WebMD. I never asked anyone if they’ve heard of it.  I chose to submerge my thoughts in the truth, not the facts.  The truth is what the Word of God says concerning our healing.  The circumstance is what WebMD says about the diagnosis. I chose to encourage my husband that God is a healer, and healing is the children’s bread. I chose to meditate on the truth and not the circumstance.  

Don’t get me wrong. We didn’t ignore anything.  Marvin went to every doctor’s appointment, took the medicine prescribed to him, and followed up with the doctor every time they requested it.  He was diligent in doing what was required of him.  He believed in doing the possible and leaving the impossible up to God.

Although Marvin battled off and on over a period of 5 years, it wasn’t every moment of every day.  God is too gracious for that.  There were many months where he walked in divine healing, and experienced miracle after miracle and had no problem in sharing his testimony and how good God had been to him. ( His entire testimony of his first round of sickness can be found in my book “Me, My Man and His Music” and is available on my website at

As believers, we have a choice if we are ever given an unfavorable report from the doctor. We can choose to believe what the Word says about our healing, or we can depress ourselves with facts. WebMD is a great tool, but just like any thing else, it’s how one uses it.    

We are all human beings.  We are going to feel the emotions connected to being told we have a health challenge and the fear that comes along with that information. Marvin and I felt that fear several times as he received several diagnoses over the years.  However, it is comforting to know that God planned for that in advance when He told us in His word, He has not given us a spirit of fear but of love, power and a sound mind.

It takes everything we have to win a battle in our body because the greatest fight is in the mind. That’s why it is critical to renew our minds in the Word of God concerning the truth of God’s promises by meditating on healing scriptures. 

So, "Who’s report will you believe?” Will it be the Word of God or WebMD? 

Wednesday, October 10, 2012

The peace of God

Exactly one month ago today, Marvin was checked into the hospital on what would be his last admittance.  

Over the past few years, his being sick and in the hospital was always accompanied by some level of stress which inhibited me from eating or sleeping properly.  Although I knew he was in good hands and receiving the best care possible, it was still hard to see the one I love suffer.

Earlier this year, I took a class at a local Bible college.  My professor shared the story of when he lost his mom.  He was in seminary school when she became very ill.   During a 7-week period of time prior to her death, he prayed for her, thanked God for her life and believed for the will of God to be done concerning her.  He shared with us how Philippians 4:6 (NASB), was the Scripture he practiced.  It reads, "Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your request be made known to God." 

When his mom passed, my professor said Philippians 4:7 (NASB) kicked in which reads, "And the peace of God which surpasses all comprehension will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."  He shared with us how close he was to his mom and how he knew that at any moment after her passing, he would "crack up".  In other words, he'd become so overwhelmed with grief to the point it would paralyze him; but that never happened.  He grieved for his mom, he cried, all the while walking in a peace that he could not explain, but he never "cracked up."

The word "and" connects the two passages together.  So, when we do verse 6, verse 7 is inevitable. My professor explained that having the peace of God during a tumultuous time in your life is a spiritual law that cannot be broken.  While you're thanking God, not worrying or being anxious, the promise in verse 7 is yours! It can't explained. It can't be understood by the human mind, and it doesn't make any sense.  In other words, like Apostle Paul said, it "surpasses all comprehension."

I can attest to that peace.   That evening I came home was the first time I was able to sleep through the night while he was in the hospital.  I wasn't stressed.  I wasn't anxious. My mind was at peace. I placed Marvin in God's hands and left him there.

I had been praying for my husband and thanking God for everything He had done for him prior to that point.  I didn't understand why he was battling so hard in his body again, but I didn't let that stop me from giving God the honor and the praise.  Actually, during the last few weeks of his life, I worshiped, praised and thanked God in my prayer time, more than I asked for healing.

Currently, I am walking in a tsunami of peace.  Am I still crying?  Yep.  Am I still grieving? Yep.  Do I miss my husband?  Yep, yep, yep.  However, a promise is a promise.  We can do all of those things and still not "crack up" because God is a promise keeper.  His peace is guarding my heart and my mind. 

Some days I wake up and think this all really sucks.  I believe I have felt just about every emotion connected to losing someone you love.  However, the peace of God is a law and every day I walk in a great measure of it.

I will continue to be anxious for nothing, and give Him praise because I always want to be in a position to receive the promise of the peace of God.  It's a law that cannot be broken.

Friday, October 5, 2012

The DNA of a Worshiper

Marvin was a worshiper.  He loved the Lord with all his heart.  He loved to worship as he played the drums for the King of kings and Lord of lords.  He often encouraged other musicians how important it is to worship and and have a relationship with Jesus, and that they should always pray before they play.

The Bible says to train up a child in the way he should go and when he is old, he will not depart from it.  (Proverbs 22:6)

We have two daughters, Marielle (19) and Simone (17).  Over the years, we have poured into them how important it is to have their own relationship with Jesus. We taught them the Word and lived it before them.  They saw their father worship on the drums when he played and knew it was a lifestyle for him.

As I stated in a previous blog, Marvin had been in and out of the hospital over the course of 5 years.   However, on Monday, September 10 he was admitted for the last time.

My mother-in-law had been staying with us to help care for him for several weeks prior. That Monday evening before leaving the hospital, she asked Marvin if he wanted her to stay with him, he responded, "Go home and get some rest."

The next morning, I headed to work and my mother-in-law went to the hospital.  She was going to take the morning shift to be with him, and I the evening shift.  Upon her arrival to the hospital the staff would not let her in his room.  Sometime around 8 am, Marvin informed the nurses he was having a hard time breathing so they proceeded to insert a breathing tube and his heart stopped beating.  They were able to revive him and placed him on a ventilator.  She called me to tell me what happened and the last thing she said to me was, "They are trying to save him."  I immediately left the church office where I work with one of our staff pastors and headed to the hospital.

While in the family waiting area we began to make phone calls and many came to the hospital. In addition to my husband getting better, my next concern was for my girls. I needed to tell them myself what was going on with their dad, and assure them we are all praying and believing that he pull through.  I didn't want them hearing it from anyone else, so I asked some friends to bring them to the hospital that evening so we could talk.

Around 7:58 pm my mother-in-law went to check on Marvin, but quickly returned where we were gathered to inform us that he "flatlined" and we needed to pray.  We began to intercede and pray for him.  Within moments the nurse came in to tell us what was going on, and said this would be a good time to discuss what he wishes are, but also that the situation was not hopeless.

My girls arrived at the hospital around 8:15 pm.  I immediately took them in a room to chat in private about the status of Marvin's condition.  As I headed towards the private room, the doctor beckoned for me. I asked him to wait a minute, because I needed to speak with my girls first.  Little did I know, my husband had already passed. Looking back, Marvin left, when our girls arrived.

I began to explain to Marielle and Simone what happened that morning; that his heart stopped, and how he'd been resuscitated.  I also shared with them that we're in this together and a lot of people are praying for him.  After we all cried, and they shared their feelings about what was happening, I told them the doctor needed to see me, and I'd be right back.

As I stood outside of Marvin's hospital room the doctor began to give me all of the specifics of what just occurred.  I can't t tell you anything he said but this, ..."And we worked on him for 30 minutes." I responded, "So he's gone?".  He said, "Yes, he's gone."  I didn't comprehend what the doctor was saying to me until I turned around and saw the hospital Chaplin. I looked at Marvin and didn't see any movement.  At that moment it started to sink in, but quickly became a reality when his sister let out a loud scream.  I immediately ran down the hall to where I left my girls because I knew if they heard her screaming they would realize he didn't make it.  As I entered the room where they were, the only thing I could get out of my mouth was, "Girls, he's gone."

Immediately, Simone lifted her hands, with tears running down her cheeks, she said, "Lord I thank you for the 17 years you have given me with my dad. Thank you for allowing him to be my dad. Thank you for his life.  Thank you Lord because You've been so good to us.  I honor You. I praise You. I magnify Your name.  You are worthy of all of praise. I love you Lord.  You are worthy of all the glory. Thank you for who You are."  Then she prayed, "Lord I thank you for my mom.  I honor her. Thank you for how she took care of my dad.  Thank you for strengthening her.  Thank you that my mom loved my dad..." etc.  Where she ended, Marielle began.  She too, worshiped, praised and honored God. Simone ended that moment by saying, "The Lord giveth and the Lord taketh away, blessed it be the name of the Lord."

The only thing I could say was, "Wow! What a legacy."

My girls blew me away!  In one of the most earth shattering moments of their lives, all they could do was worship!  The only thing they had on their lips was a praise!  They didn't curse God, and they weren't made at God. They worshiped God!

That was the legacy of Marvin McQuitty.  Worship was in his DNA.

As we have begun the journey of our lives without him, I know we're going to be okay.  It will take some time to heal.  It will take some time to grieve, and it will take some time to adjust.  How long?  I don't know.  But what I do know is that we will continue to worship.  We will continue to bless the name of the Lord.  We will continue to praise and honor Him.  Because at the end of the day, it's all about Him and never about us.  Worship is in our DNA.

Monday, October 1, 2012

What you didn't know about Marvin

The girls and I have received condolences from around the world since Marvin's passing. From just about every state in the United States, to multiple places around the world such as France, England, Hong Kong, Panama, Chile, Columbia, Brazil, Capetown South Africa, Argentina, Durban, Luanda Africa, Tanzania, Antigua West Indies, Nigeria, and more.  Then there are several Facebook messages I received in other languages that I haven't been able to read.  To say he was loved around the world is an understatement.

The remarks and comments about Marvin had a comment thread, "He was a great guy, he walked in so much humility, he really impacted my life, he was such a blessing to me, he was an inspiration to me...", and the list goes on.

Everything, everyone has said is true.  However, there is one thing most people didn't know about Marvin, he was stubborn (and at times I was very grateful).  One definition of stubborn reads, "fixed or set in purpose or opinion."  I know that sounds contrary, but had it not been for his stubbornness, you would not have known he existed.  I shared this story in my book about Marvin's transition into full-time music ministry.  He was gainfully employed for 10 years as a bus driver for a city transportation company which provided great benefits and respectable wages.  However, Marvin knew in his heart he was destined for more that just driving the bus for the rest of his life.  As one friend told him over 20 years ago, "You are the world's best kept secret."

While his "purpose" was calling him, I was telling him there was no way he could make a living doing music full time.  He knew in his heart that an opportunity was before him and he could either seize it now or regret it later.  He decided to seize it and the platform Marvin was given to play on with Fred Hammond and RFC introduced him to the world!  I'm happy he was fixed and set on his opinion about his "purpose", or in other words--stubborn.  He didn't listen to what I thought was best for us and as a result, many people have been touched and ministered to by him that would not have otherwise been reached.

My husband didn't die with seeds in his pocket.  He planted them by imparting wisdom into others and mentoring young musicians during his short time on earth.  He accomplished what he was sent here to do.

Over 1,000 people attend the services for him in two states not including those who logged into the live stream.  Marvin definitely practiced what he preached because he, "Didn't just make a mark, he blew a hole in it," and it all began because he chose to be stubborn.

Thursday, September 27, 2012

This time, he's not coming back

Marvin and I have been separated many times before. Not for marital issues, but because of his call to the music ministry.  He traveled the world leaving the girls and I alone for long periods of time over the course of 17 years.

Now we're separated again.  But this time it's permanent.   He won't be coming back to tell me how everything went.  I won't get the "just landed" text that I received every time he arrived at his destination. He won't be sharing stories with me about how the Lord moved.  He won't have jokes about who he sat next to on the plane and why there was a kid kicking the back of his seat the entire flight.  WOW! He's really gone!

I'm still processing and adjusting to his absence.  I can truthfully say I didn't consider this walk this early on in my life.  I've been married longer than I've been single, so to say this is an adjustment is an understatement.  I'm an "all in" person.  Loyal and dedicated. I believe in doing everything required of me as a wife.  I'm not saying I am perfect...not in the least.  But I am one of those women who made certain my husband and kids were care for by ME.  That's just who I am. 

I thought we'd grow old together.  We talked about the future. We talked about sitting on the porch with a rifle when the girls would bring their dates over to meet us.  We even talked about what we wanted our grandchildren to call us.

I am overjoyed that my husband is no longer suffering.  He fought LONG and HARD. However, I wish it were here on earth...still here with me and the girls.  I wish he was walking in his "head to toe healing" and telling his testimony of restoration on every platform and pulpit across the globe.  I know, it's selfish, but that's how I feel.   In reality he is totally healed and restored and I'm thankful to God for that.

There is one scripture that has been resonating in my spirit since Marvin left.  Proverbs 19:21 says, "You can make many plans, but the Lord's purpose will prevail." Marvin and I had plans.  We planned to continue speaking into the lives of musician's and their wives to let them know that God is faithful and He can sustain and keep your marriage.  But God had other plans for Marvin.  His work is done, and now he is in paradise.  The Lord's purpose has prevailed in his life.

As I'm left to complete my divine assignment, I will walk in the purpose and plan God has for my life.  I will continue to speak into the lives of musician's and their wives.  I will impart and mentor women who are desperately seeking direction.  I will continue what we started.  And when the day comes for me to "go home" I will see my husband, and we will never be separated again.

God is still God.  God is still good, and to God be all the glory!